Is it wrong for me to stay with the person I like?
“Eh? Is that so? I didn’t know.”
“I wanted to keep it secret from you. I wanted to surprise you.”
“Sheesh, you really did surprise me.”
“Fufu. It was a success then.”
Noah told me what he has been up to all this time cheerfully. I thought Noah would cry a lot the day I said farewell to him, but he obediently listened to my selfishness.
He didn’t blame me, instead, he spoke with an adult’s realization, saying: “If you are fine with that, I am fine with that as well.” It made me think that Noah was disappointed with me and came to dislike me.
“You know, I have been studying a lot every day since then. I also did my best learning swordsmanship from Uncle Fii.”
“As expected of my Noah. You are mot-…”
I was about to utter “You are mother’s pride.” Not good. It seems to have become a habit before I noticed it. There, Noah spoke up.
“You and only you, will be my Mother no matter where you are. I am Mother’s child.”
I wanted to beg for forgiveness, but I swallowed my selfish words. I love him. Even if we are not connected by blood, I can only think of him as my own child. It was me who let go of Noah’s hands even though I knew I would miss him dearly.
Noah, however, apparently didn’t place me in a position of blame.
“I don’t understand your situation well, Mother. But, is it wrong for me to stay with the person I like?”
Noah said as if he has seen my hesitation.
“You see. I was thinking. I begged God every single night. To allow me to stay with Mother and Uncle forever. In fact, I secretly asked Santa, too. Did I get punished because of that?”
“You are a good child Noah, you wouldn’t get punished.”
“But, even though I still have a Father, I thought that it would have been nice if Uncle Fii was my Father instead. I like Uncle more than I like Father. That’s why I got punished, no? The Dark Santa also took Mother far away from me.”
Noah said with tears gathering in his eyes. He wondered whether my divorce and me leaving the mansion was his fault.
“I wanted to tell you not to leave that day. I wanted to tell you to bring me with you. But, I had to accept my punishment…”
The parting day. Seeing Noah say that he didn’t want me to leave, I embraced him tightly. When I did, “It hurts, Mother.” he said with a nasal voice.
“Noah, I’m sorry. It’s all my fault. You did nothing wrong.”
“I… Mother… wanted to see you…”
“Me too. Noah.”
We cried a lot until my parents called for us.