An unexpected attribute change.
Due to the gods’ excessive generosity, divine power was poured into Valkyrie and Rosie-kun. What should I do? If I attack carelessly and scatter it, it could lead to a catastrophe… right? I glanced at the useless Sage, who had probably come over out of concern but was of no help, his eyes looking like those of a dead fish.
"Don’t even think about it. Don’t lose control, stupid disciple."
The perverted Sage, having somehow sensed my destructive impulse from that glance, warned me.
"I just want to blow everything away. I’ve had enough. This doesn’t feel like a celebration—it feels like a curse."
"I get it! Calm down! Dirk-dono, please restrain her! If she starts rampaging, it’ll be a disaster!"
"… Understood. Honestly, I want to go on a rampage too… but that would probably make things worse. Rosarin, come here."
"Diiiirk!!"
Rosarin, who is weak to Dirk, immediately leaped into his arms when called. Ahh… so soothing. I want to forget everything and just sulk in bed with Dirk.
For now, I’ll have the Watase Grandma scold the celestials properly. I’ll make sure to tattle on them when I go to greet her. Now, how do I settle this situation…? Maybe I should insist this was all just an entertainment act. And what should I do about those lazy gods…?
"I'm scared! My outrageous disciple is terrifying!! Stop grinning like you’re plotting something!"
"It can’t be helped. This kind of treatment on my big day… How could I possibly let this grudge go unavenged…?"
"I kind of… no, I definitely understand how you feel, but stop! It’s not like they’re trying to mess with the rings or anything—"
From the cocoon-like mass of magic power emerged… an unbelievably cute child. Their clothing had a unique mix of Japanese and fantasy elements. The top was traditional Japanese attire, but the bottom was pants. They had earmuffs where their real ears should be, along with antennae-like accessories, giving off a slightly sci-fi vibe. And leopard ears.
Valkyrie had transformed into an adorable girl who looked like a younger version of Dirk.
"Valkyrie… Valkyrie turned into a moe-style character!??"
Valkyrie had magnificently evolved from a robot into a cute, leopard-eared loli. Rosie-kun also transformed, adopting a Japanese fantasy-style outfit. Unlike Valkyrie, since he hadn’t eaten a computer, he lacked any sci-fi elements.
"Master, I have evolved into something called a Tsukumogami. I will continue to serve you! I have gained many new abilities! I will do my best!"
"Ehhh!?"
"Rosie, are you okay?"
"I'm fine, I’m fine. I just got infused with divine power. Thanks to that, I’ve become something like a spirit, so I can sustain myself on ambient mana and food now. From now on, I’ll help with my master’s work!"
As a result of their transformation into Tsukumogami, they could now function to some extent even without our will or magic power supply. Their very nature had become ambiguous.
"Eh? Oh. Thanks. Rosie, you’re such a good boy."
"Ehehe."
Seeing Rosie-kun smile bashfully as Dirk praised him, I felt like this was fine as it was. But more importantly, it’s time for punishment! (Please read that in the style of a certain skull-faced character.)
"Valkyrie!"
"Rosariiin!!"
Responding to my will, Valkyrie transformed into a bat. Time to swing!
"Finishing move! Head Bat Strike!!"
"Headbutt means a direct strike with the head! That’s totally different!!"
Thanks for the tsukkomi, Ten-chan! I specifically aimed my bat at the gods who had been slacking off inside a cactus and sent them flying into the sky.
"Truly, an act that defies even the gods…"
"Oh, gods…!"
"What a blasphemous act…"
"That was an excellent swing."
God or not, I never forget to get my revenge. My motto is: "Return kindness twofold, return grudges tenfold." By the way, the War Pope… he’s ridiculously muscle-brained. The other popes seemed to have too many suspicions about what was inside that cactus, and they were all flustered. They won’t die, so it’s fine.
Previously, Valkyrie wouldn’t have been able to pull this off, but now that she’s in her Mega-God form, she can smack down only the gods. Honestly, this is their own fault. That was your undoing, you fools! I swung Valkyrie (in her spiked bat form) around with a sense of unity.
"Wait, Rin! No, was it Rosarin!? We can talk this out!!"
Sensing danger, the celestials shouted. Minato-san and the others nodded desperately.
"If talking alone could solve everything, wars wouldn’t exist. This kind of treatment on my big day… How could I possibly let this grudge go unavenged…?"
Perfect timing. I put on my sister Koto’s Hannya mask. A beam shot out of it. Apparently, beams come standard.
"Ri… Rosarin, -san? Our fathers will get a proper, proper scolding from Baba Watase, so can you let it go at that? It wouldn’t be good to leave the guests like this, right?"
"Understood. Make sure to scold them thoroughly. If you don’t want to be excluded from Dan’s miraculous dinner, behave yourselves."
The celestial fox nodded. Meanwhile, Kurarin… was trembling like a defeated heroine.
"Pl-p-pl-p…"
The fact that she was literally saying "p-p-p-pl" showed she still had some composure. Suddenly, I became incredibly calm… and realized just how bad the situation was.
"Ah~ Kaasan."
"Hm?"
"Should we just tamper with the memories of unrelated people?"
Rosie-kun made a brilliant suggestion.
"Rosie-kun, you’re so smart! Amazing! Fantastic!!"
"Ehehe… Ah, but we need Valkyrie’s help. She’s sulking, so do something about that."
My Valkyrie had completely transformed from a robot into a cute, leopard-eared loli… The sense of dissonance was overwhelming… but she was so fluffy. Her ears were so soft. I petted her, and she seemed to cheer up.
"Still, we need something with an impact strong enough to overwrite the previous events…"
"… Is it my turn?"
Gora-chan looked at me intently. An event even more shocking than the God Home Run Incident… I nodded. But Gora-chan was a second helping—people had already seen him in action.
"… Is it time for the Meat Saintess to make her appearance?"
"Stop it! Please, stop! Stupid boss! Don’t bring shame to Wolfanea!!"
A long time ago… there was an old man who used that cursed magical girl staff. He still had an (muscularly) impressive body.
"In that case, me too."
The retired former King of Wolfanea stood up. His more sensible sons tried to stop him, but as usual, the troublesome old man refused to listen.
"Father, please stop."
"Father, do you want to be denied dinner?"
"For my lord, if shaming myself benefits her, I shall endure it."
"Father, my lord has not recognized you. I haven’t even been recognized yet."
Nope. I hate both options. And Jess, you still haven’t given up, huh? Then, reading the atmosphere, Rinka’s cursed staff activated.
"Behold! I shall save the troubled lambs☆ Magical Girl☆ Dogezaemon☆ makes her entrance!!"
The sight before me was… overwhelmingly destructive.
A muscular old man with arms thick as logs, covered in body hair, in a magical girl costume.
Then, to top it off… a lean yet muscular nearly-naked man with only a leaf covering his groin.
"Rosie-kun, do you think this is impactful enough…?"
"… No problems here!"
And with that, memories were successfully overwritten. The guests were left with dead-fish eyes, but oh well. This was all the gods’ fault.
What do you think about this chapter?
