Kanata-san’s what the hell.
My name is Toono Kanata. I’m often asked if it’s a pseudonym, but that’s my real name.
I had a normal… a very normal life. My parents died, and I was orphaned as a child, but I became independent and started living on my own. I had friends, and even a girlfriend. I also had a job. The night she dumped me, and I was drinking away my sorrow, my world dramatically changed.
That current me was in such a pinch that I wanted to escape from reality.
“Gyaaaah!?”
Earlier, there was a giant snake sleeping on the road, and when I chose a detour route, I was chased by a spider, then a tiger? Then something that looked like Gu○ko (グ○コ) runner, and finally, I was being chased by a dragon! No, wait! There was something obviously wrong happening in the middle!
“Hey! I am really not that good tasting!”
The dragon tilted its head while running. Huh? Isn’t it quite cute? Nono, this isn’t time to be looking away! It’s downhill from now on! I can get some distance here!
“Magic Tracing!!”
This is a Revelation that was given to me by God which transforms the magical power into matter. However, it’s limited to constructs that the user understands. So I made a skateboard, and slid down the hill.
“This is scaaaary!?”
Skateboarding down the mountain road was too dangerous. The momentum was too great, the skateboard could break at any moment, and the rattling was making me feel like I was going to fall! This is too dangerous!
“I’m going to dieee!!”
“Crap! Mofumaru! Save him!!”
I heard the voice of an angel. It was my waifu of the past… the divine voice that had healed me. I’m in serious trouble, aren’t I? I distracted myself for a moment, and it was this moment I fell off the cliff.
“Waaaaah!?”
Something white and red crossed in front of me, and I fell.
And then, I was engulfed by mofumofu. My field of vision was all white. It appears that I was saved by a big fluffer.
“Onii~chan, are you okay? The game of tag was very fun.”
The dragon from earlier approached me. A game of tag!? Despite its appearance, the dragon had a cute, child-like voice.
“Eh?”
My mind can’t keep up at all with this. Were dragons creatures that could speak? I wasn’t playing a tag in the first place. I was running away for my life desperately… while I was in a daze, a huge robot fell down before me. It’s funny, I thought this world was supposed to be a fantasy world of swords and magic. Why is there a robot from a science fiction world?
“Rosariiin!!”
It’s really cool, but what the hell is up with this “Rosariin!!”. I couldn’t think, I couldn’t think at all. The scene in front of me was too chaotic. I found myself surrounded by a dragon, a robot, a spider, and a tiger.
Is this my end?
Whatever, the Gu○ko is missing, though.
“Nice to meet you, Kanata-san.”
“…………… Hah?”
People from kansai go “What the hell” when something unexpected happens, and I always thought that I will never say it myself. However.
After running for my life, a mysterious beautiful girl came down from the hands of the giant robot with a sign in her hands saying that the surprise was a great success (and it was written in Japanese).
“What the heeeell!!”
I, Toono Kanata, 25 years old, exploded with my best tsukkomi at the angelic, angular-eyed beauty holding up the sign of a successful surprise right in front of me.
And after this, I think I will keep saying ‘What the hell’ for the rest of my life.
I can only say, what the hell.