Slime Goodwill Ambassador*4
Anyway, with that, we moved across the country as a convoy of cars and bikes.
… Yeah. We stood out. A lot. Like, seriously stood out.
I mean, of course we did. In a world where even bikes still weren’t properly widespread, suddenly having multiple automobiles zooming along was bound to draw attention…
Everyone we passed along the road stared at us wide-eyed. Some horses pulling carriages got spooked, which made me feel a little bad for the drivers. Not that the drivers themselves were any calmer, they were all completely taken aback by this mysterious group…
“It’s fast and it feels great, Asuma-sama!”
“Yeah. It does. By the way, Mishisia-san. Want to switch back and let me drive? You’ve been going way too fast for a while now, haven’t you?”
… For the record, the car carrying me, Mishisia-san, the Giant-Ass Slime, and the slime-loving big sister had surged into the lead. Why? Because the moment I let Mishisia-san take the wheel, she started flooring it like crazy!
Riding in Mishisia-san’s terrifyingly driven car probably shaved ten years off my lifespan. But, well, I’m alive. I can feel that I’m alive. What is this? Is this how it is even before entering the dungeon…?
Just like that, we stayed one night at a nearby post town, then set off again the next morning.
Cars and bikes are fast. Really fast. A road that would normally take a full five days to travel could be cleared in just over a day. Well, yeah. Engines don’t need to eat grass like horses do. They don’t need rest, either. And as long as you toss in a magic stone for fuel, that’s that. Incredibly convenient.
More than anything, the ride comfort had improved dramatically! The car we were riding in originated from the bicycle I developed in the very early days, and things like using the soft, springy mana of slimes in the tires were largely unchanged. On top of that, I’d stubbornly insisted, “We should totally put in a suspension!” Thanks to that, the ride was smooth!
A smooth ride means you don’t get nearly as tired from traveling. Or rather, thinking about it the other way around, up until now, just riding in a carriage or on horseback had exhausted us to an absurd degree. Now that that was gone, this really was a revolution!
The elves also seemed amazed by this method of travel. They couldn’t hide their astonishment, murmuring things like, “What an incredibly comfortable vehicle…”
… Well, there was one person buried in slime who didn’t really get to comment on ride comfort. Yeah. Today again, behind Mishisia-san and me, she wore the serene expression of someone who’d achieved enlightenment, as if thinking, this is the ultimate ride comfort. What even is this anymore?
And so, as we continued onward, we finally drew close to the place in question.
“From here on, we enter a neighboring country. Anything could happen. Advance with caution.”
At Laperesiana-sama’s words, the tension rose.
… That’s right. From here on out, it was a neighboring nation. One we’d been at war with until fairly recently.
“By the way, what actually caused that war?”
So, with that in mind, on our last night and last meal within our own country, I decided to ask Lisas-san while I had the chance. He was directly involved, after all.
“Ah… well, to put it simply, a third country, neither ours nor theirs, started fighting over which nation should claim a holy land. That fallout led to disputes over resources and territory, dragging the surrounding region into it. Eventually, it reached the point where if we and the neighboring country didn’t fight, we’d lose territory, so it escalated into war.”
“Religion really never does anything good, huh.”
“I think so too.”
Sitting across from me, Lisas-san let out a sigh and stared off into the distance.
Yeah… because of that, he lost an eye and an arm. And, as collateral damage, his job and his wife, too…
“… Anyway, that’s why the other country is a troublesome opponent in its own right. They tried to snatch our territory amid the chaos.”
“Let me guess, was there also some baseless promise from yet another country, like, ‘If you side with us, we’ll give you that part of their land’ or something with no authority or justification?”
“Hm? You know your stuff. Did you hear that from Laperesiana-sama?”
“No, it’s just… history really does repeat itself everywhere.”
As I found myself gazing into the distance too, another concern popped into my head.
Because, well… our destination was the neighboring country, sure, but inside it was the elven forest.
“So, about how elves are treated in that neighboring country…”
… With that, I asked Lisas-san, and then a voice came from behind.
“They see us as a nuisance.”
Turning around, I saw the leader elf standing there. Oh. A firsthand witness!
“By ‘nuisance,’ you mean…?”
I gestured for him to take the seat next to me, but the leader elf remained standing. Maybe he didn’t want to sit at the same table as humans. That was fine.
“I mean it exactly as stated. They seem to think, ‘If those elves weren’t there, we could make better use of the land.’”
“Huh.”
“On the other hand, they’ve prospered this far thanks to the benefits of elven magic. So while we’re a nuisance, they can’t eliminate us either. To accept our aid and grow wealthy, then claim both elves and forest are an inconvenience, what a display of ingratitude.”
I see. Sounds like the neighboring country had its own problems. And the elves probably had an attitude like, We granted humans our aid, so they should bow their heads and keep quiet.
… Honestly, how did these people even manage to live in the same country? It was a mystery they hadn’t split apart already. How did this not lead to even more conflict?
“Uh… don’t elves ever try to become independent from human countries?”
“Why should elves have to give our land to humans?”
“Ah. So both sides think it’s their country…”
My head was starting to hurt, but let’s put that aside. I had no intention of sticking my nose into that mess, so they could sort it out themselves.
“So there aren’t any humans living in the elven forest, then.”
“Correct. The elven forest is considered off-limits to humans…. Which is precisely why the forest burning is such a serious matter.”
“Ah~ so it also means losing territory.”
If it’s no longer a forest, it’s no longer off-limits. In that case, people would just burn it. Yeah. I get it.
“… So that means the people who benefit from burning the elven forest aren’t just the former Grand Cathedral faction on our side, but also high-ranking figures in the other country.”
“That’s likely. It’s been troubling us as well.”
Huh. I’d assumed the former Grand Cathedral faction was trying to force their ‘salvation technology’ on the elves by making their lives miserable, but now it looked like there could be more players involved. Hmm.
“In that case, I’m really glad we brought the slimes along.”
“… By the way, you said you’d use those slimes to conquer the dungeon, but what exactly are they? One of our elves seems to be trapped inside one…”
Yeah… I’d appreciate it if you’d overlook that part. She trapped herself voluntarily.
“The dungeon conquest will use some… unconventional techniques. The slimes are more for cleanup afterward.”
“I see.”
Well… slimes have all kinds of strengths. This time, I planned to make use of those.
So, after eating, sleeping, and reaching the next day, I firmly secured the driver’s seat so Mishisia-san wouldn’t go wild again. Driving with an elementary-schooler body is honestly pretty tough, but I powered through with sheer determination. Because otherwise, I’d get launched again! I really would!
“Ohhh, I can see it now. That’s a lot of forest.”
“Well of course, Asuma-sama! It’s a forest! Naturally! Elves live there!”
… And so, driving safely, a forest came into view.
Lush green leaves swayed in the wind, stretching on endlessly… Really endlessly.
“A forest…”
“Indeed. The elven forest…. Look, over there, where it’s burned. That’s because of the dungeon.”
We took in the elven forest while letting out impressed oohs. I see. With forest covering everything, the damage was painfully obvious.
The faint smell of char drifting on the wind practically said, Yeah, this is burned. Apparently, elves found this scent deeply unpleasant, they all frowned, and Mishisia-san made a face too. To me, though, it just smelled like controlled burns or field clearing.
“Shall we head for the dungeon at once, then?”
“No. Wait.”
As Laperesiana-sama grinned and readied her cavalry lance, clearly sensing battle, the elves shook their heads, a bit tense.
“It would be better to prepare ourselves here. From here on, we’re truly near the dungeon… an area where monsters appear frequently. So much so that even we struggle.”
I see. So monsters swarm beyond this point.
… From the way the elves talked about it, “swarm” was probably no exaggeration. Enough monsters outside the dungeon to prevent them from even attempting a conquest. Yeah…
“I see. Then if it’s monsters everywhere even outside the dungeon, it’s time for the Royal Third Knights Order to shine.”
… I was a little worried about how happy Laperesiana-sama looked at the mention of monsters. Does she really love fighting that much? I’d heard she was strong, but still…
“And we will carve a path to the dungeon… We’ll be relying on you for the dungeon itself, Asuma-sama. Will that be acceptable?”
“Leave it to me!”
At this point, there was nothing to do but steel myself. I covered my worries and anxieties with enthusiasm and motivation, picturing the equipment loaded onto the vehicles behind us.
And so…
“I can see monsters, Asuma-sama!”
“Uwoooaaah! There are a lot of pretty normal-looking but seriously dangerous ones!”
As we advanced through the forest, the surroundings grew more and more scorched… and roaming across the ground were giant lizards, or rather, dragons.
I see. Definitely the fire-breathing type. And they looked strong.
“I see. How amusing. Did mere lizards truly believe they could halt our advance?”
And here was Laperesiana-sama. The beautiful woman laughed heartily, raised a cavalry lance that looked way too heavy, and cried out gallantly…
“Royal Third Knights Order, sortie! Annihilate these arrogant lizards!”
… Following the knights’ battle cries came the roar of bike engines. Not the sound of hooves, mind you…
But the advance of the knights, no, riders, was overwhelming. Are cavalry lances and motorcycles actually a good match? No. That can’t be right.
The dragons were apparently terrified by this charge. Well, yeah. They’d never seen large motorcycles before. Unknown iron steeds roaring with engines would scare anyone.
The moment one dragon fell to Laperesiana-sama’s lance, the knights began skewering others one after another. Seeing that, the remaining dragons fled.
“Don’t let them escape!”
Laperesiana-sama and the bike unit pursued them into the forest. Godspeed.
“Armored vehicles, move out!”
Next came the armored cars. Inside, knights were loading crossbows. Meaning those things were mobile fortresses, capable of firing from within. They even had excellent fire resistance. The armored vehicles themselves were developed by the royal castle; I’d only supplied the crossbows. I didn’t know the details.
“A-are all humans like that…?”
“No, they’re… special cases.”
The elven leader looked dumbfounded. Please don’t think that’s the human default. I don’t want to think so either.
Honestly, watching Laperesiana-sama and the Third Knights Order fight made it all click. Of course they’d win wars if they marched out like this. Of course they would.
“… What should we do?”
The elves were at a loss. Understandable, they hadn’t expected humans to fight with such ferocity. Neither had I.
“Oh, then please take these fire extinguishers.”
“What are these?”
“If something’s burning, spray it. It’ll go out.”
“What in the world is that!?”
Maybe fire extinguishers were a bit too advanced for elves. But, hey, better safe than sorry. I had them carry them anyway.
“And then, please guard us. We’ll advance straight to the dungeon entrance… um, above all else, do not generate any flames. We’ve taken precautions on our end too, but I want to be extra careful.”
Yeah. The elves had a job too, guarding us.
We were planning to conquer the dungeon without entering it, but we still had to reach the entrance. The more guards, the better.
“… I heard you intend to defeat the dungeon without entering it.”
“Yes. I believe that’s the safest approach…”
… Well, “safe” might be debatable. But I thought this was the best option.
To deal with the dungeon while revealing as little as possible, things like chemical weapons or dungeon power, to the elves, and especially to hide the extremely dangerous fact that we might be able to seize the dungeon master’s seat, this was the optimal plan.
So, protected by the elves, we advanced. Three cars followed along.
… The elves eyed the vehicles suspiciously, but that was understandable. They didn’t know what they were. Then again, no one in this world really did…
“Oh. Is that the dungeon entrance?”
And there it was. Amid the completely scorched surroundings stood a lone shrine, and within it, stairs descending underground. This was apparently our target.
“Alright then, let’s start injection right away. Bring the tanker truck up. Okay, easy, easy.”
I guided the car into position.
Then we extended hoses from the tanks loaded onto the vehicles and fed them into the dungeon interior. Lisas-san and the elves helped with this work. Thanks. For someone with an elementary-schooler body, even hoses are heavy.
“… What are you doing?”
The elves looked puzzled. So I handed them gas masks and said, “Please put these on.” Once they’d all donned matching gas masks and thoroughly completed their transformation into suspicious individuals…
“Uh, we’re about to inject hydrogen cyanide.”
… I am repeating humanity’s sins. I’m sorry!
What do you think about this chapter?
