Chapter 142

Her Majesty the Queen (2)
I was still having tea in the Queen’s private room, chatting about all sorts of things—like what things are like in the Lampail Territory, and how I met Snowy.

“By the way, just being honest here, what do you think of Albert and Fred?”

“That’s a sudden shift in topic... Can I be honest?”

“Of course. Don’t hold back.”

“Prince Albert is scheming, and Prince Fred is a bratty tyrant.”

“”””Pffft.””””

“Joan-chan, you're the best!! I feel you~!!”

“... And you're their mother saying that.”

“Yeah, but it's *because* I'm their mother that I can say it. So then, between the two, who would you rather marry?”

“”””What!?””””

We all exclaimed in unison—me and the three maids were shocked by the Queen’s words.

“Did you just say ‘marry’?”

“Yeah. Because if I want to become family with Joan-chan, marrying one of them is the fastest way, right?”

“Why family?”

“Because it’d be so much more fun having someone from your hometown nearby! So? Which one’s your type?”

“Hmm, I’ll pass on both.”

“Ehh, why? They’ll grow into handsome guys like Alex, you know? Total boy-band idol types.”

“Ah, personally, I prefer the lean and muscular type over skinny guys. More like the 16-member dance and vocal groups than J-pop idols.”

“Ahhh~ that kind of style~ Then my boys aren’t it. Too bad.”

“Mah bad.”

“Ahaha. That apology clearly wasn’t sincere.”

“Um, sorry to interrupt the conversation, but why would you refuse a match with the princes? Normally, people would be scrambling to promote themselves.”

“Right? In noble society, political marriages are the norm. You marry even if they’re not your type.”

“Exactly! We’re talking royalty here! That’s a once-in-a-lifetime chance!”

The maid trio chimed in, but—

“First of all, in our family, love marriages have been the tradition for generations. Political marriages are out of the question. None of my brothers have fiancées, either. And as for marrying into royalty—zero interest. Absolutely not. It’d just be a huge hassle. That’s all.”

“Ahaha, if you’re that clear about it, then it’s definitely not happening. All three of you should know—Joan-chan has memories from her past life, so common sense here doesn’t really apply. And it’s the Lampail family, you know? No way. Don’t worry, Joan-chan, I won’t even tell His Majesty about this, so you won’t be forced into any engagement.”

“Thank you very much. …Please accept this.”

I handed her a dried goods set from my storage. Inside: dried bonito flakes, dried shiitake mushrooms, hijiki seaweed, and kelp.

“What’s this?”

“Just a little something.”

The Queen checked the contents.

“Hehe, you’re quite the schemer.”

“Hehe, so are you, Your Majesty.”

“”Ahahaha.””

This is so much fun. No wonder she she died in her 40s.

She even gets the old period drama jokes.

“Your Majesty and Young lady Joan… are you really meeting for the first time?”

““Yup.””

“How are you two getting along so well already?”

““We’re from the same hometown?””

“Did you know each other in a past life?”

““Hmm, probably not.””

“”“………”””

Yeah, I can understand why the maid trio looks so bewildered.

Even I didn’t expect to hit it off this well on our first meeting.

It’d be fun to become family… but royalty is way too much trouble.

“Should we be heading back soon? I bet Margrave Lampail is worried.”

“Ah, probably. Though if he is worried, it’s probably about whether I caused any trouble.”

“Haha, no trust at all.”

“Well, I’ve been called ‘out of the ordinary’ a lot.”

“That much? What exactly makes you so out of the ordinary?”

“Ah~ actually, I have the Null attribute. But I still have eight skills. The dried fruits I make with skills have triple the usual effect. And when I tried to heal an injured white horse with overlapping skills, it turned into a pegasus.”

“Just that? That’s totally outrageous! And wait—Null?! You’ve got eight skills with Null?! That’s totally cheat-level. I’m dying.”

“By the way, don’t you have any cheats, Your Majesty?”

“Hmm, my attributes are Water and Wind. My skills are Heal S, Assist, and Teleport.”

“Wait, that’s totally cheat-tier too. Two attributes? That’s even possible? I also have Assist and Teleport.”

“Yeah. Having two attributes is rare, and people treated me like some strange beast at first. But thanks to that, I met Alex, so I guess it all worked out.”

“Ohh~ you just slipped in a humblebrag.”

“Mah bad. We’re in our seventeenth year of newlywed life! Still totally lovey-dovey, smooch smooch!!”

“Ugh, too sweet. I feel like I’m getting heartburn. Oh, by the way, Heal S—what does it do?”

“Ah~ I can heal up to near-fatal wounds. But I rarely use it. It’d hurt the temple’s business, after all~”

In this world, people apparently go to the temple instead of a hospital for things like treatment and childbirth. Since payment takes the form of offerings, the Queen avoids using her skill so as not to cut into temple income.

“You said earlier you have Assist too, right, Joan-chan? Actually, I don’t know how to use it. Could you teach me?”

“Wait, really? It’s super useful. Basically, it’s like an AI.”

“No way, seriously? I didn’t know. How do you use it?”

“Just call out to it in your head. Like ‘Hey!’ or something.”

“Ohh, sounds totally AI-ish. Okay, I’ll try~………………”

“Wow, that’s amazing, Joan-chan. It’s teaching me all sorts of things. I didn’t even know you could cast without chanting.”

“Glad to hear it~.”

“Your Majesty, it’s about time…”

“Ah, you’re right. Joan-chan, will you come visit again?”

“Sure. But I’ll be going back to the Lampail Territory, so it won’t be easy. Maybe when I enter the Academy? Though, if I come here too often, won’t people get suspicious?”

“Ahh, good point. But don’t worry about that—I’ll teleport to pick you up. I go to the market incognito from time to time, so it’s no problem.”

“Incognito… I see. Thank you. I’ll keep stocking up the storage with food I make.”

“Please do!! … And next time, could you do something like fast food?”

“Dear customer~ would you like fries with that combo~?”

“Yes, absolutely~~!!”

“Roger that.”

“Well then, shall we head back?”

At the Queen’s words, the maid trio quickly retouched her makeup.

Ahh, what a fun tea party that was.

I bet no one knows the Queen is this friendly.

Hehe, I hope we get to do this again.

What do you think about this chapter?