Chapter 42

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You wanted him to consult with you, right?
“Anton knew that, didn’t he?”
“I think he did. He must have noticed Anna’s background.”
“Why did he elope with her then…? That’s foolish.”
“I think so too. I can’t understand why he took such actions. However, it seems that he wasn’t instigated by Anna, but something Anton decided to do himself.”
“Throwing away the lovable Noah? What does he think the position of the Commander of the Imperial Guards is?”

The anger I felt towards the missing Anton bubbled up.

“I couldn’t do something like that. If you have people to protect, you shouldn’t be leaving them behind.”
“That would normally be the case.”
“Yuri, are you angry?”
“Yes, I am angry. I am angry at Anton.”

Why didn’t he discuss it with me? Was I that unreliable existence to him? That’s too deplorable from that serious husband of mine. Did he not consider the position his father and son would be in for betraying the country?
I didn’t think my husband was such an inflexible man.
If he consulted with me, I feel that I would be able to at least stop him from eloping, even if he followed the spy back. I don’t know what Anton’s objective is, but I feel like I could have prevented him from leaving the country together with the spy.

“Why did he act without telling me anything? Even if he finds me unreliable, there are more people he could have consulted with. Even though there are so many reliable people like Father-in-law, Zail and you… that person couldn’t trust anyone, huh.”
“Yuri.”
“I mean, it’s frustrating. Even as a joke, I was his wife, you know? And yet, I knew nothing about him. I can’t understand what he was thinking. However…!”

Frustration filled my heart. I tried to be an understanding wife during the three years we were married for. However, the distance between us didn’t shrink whatsoever. I realize that he did not held a speck of interest in me. Apparently, I was less interesting to him than Anna.

“You wanted him to consult with you, right? You wanted him to trust you, right?”

Fii guessed my feelings. I felt that Fii was the person who understood me the most. He knows me well. He wiped the frustrations that was spilling on my cheeks in drops.

“Here, I will lend you this. This is a limited time offer.”
“Fii…”

He pushed me against his chest and patted my back. I feel like a child again. Fii’s embrace was warm. Anton never did something like this for me. He didn’t give me any more consideration than necessary.
This made me frequently feel unsatisfactory, but it was only natural because my husband wasn’t interested in me. Fii than whispered to my ear as I was soaking in sorrow.

“—— was his mother.”

His embrace was warm, but the wind brushing against my face was freezing.

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