Holy Assassins*3
Does a Dungeon count as something you can donate? That’s my first question here.
What, is this like that one friend of mine—he’s a descendant of some wealthy farmer out in the sticks—who once said, “I donated one of my persimmon orchards to the local temple to use as a parking lot”? Is it on that same level!?
So land can be donated!? That’s what this is!? And a Dungeon counts as something you can donate too!? Is that how it works!? Hey!
While I was busy being confused, the Churchman’s speech went on.
“It is truly lamentable that fine crystals are being treated as items of monetary value. Holy stones should pass only into the hands of those worthy to use them, and money should never come into play in the first place.”
Edele-san is frozen up. I’m frozen too. And the atmosphere in the dining hall has gone icy cold and silent.
“For a single village to monopolize a Dungeon that generates wealth is hardly healthy either. Hoarded riches only give rise to stagnant greed.”
And then that sort of talk keeps coming out of him… Huh? Is this guy sober? Seriously? He’s not drunk? Is he okay?
“The church can manage the Dungeon properly. Please, donate it.”
…… And then finally.
“The hell did you just say?”
The drunken adventurers crowded up to the Churchman.
I mean, I had noticed the hall getting real quiet, yeah! Of course it did! Everyone here is either an adventurer or a villager—in other words, all Dungeon stakeholders!
So this church guy just went and started spouting an away-game speech in the middle of complete away ground. Naturally, he glared with distaste at the adventurers pressing up on him.
“A Dungeon? Donate it? … You’re talking outta your ass, buddy.”
“So you’re just gonna use ‘donations’ as another excuse to bleed us dry?”
“Church types are filthy as ever!”
Drunks are invincible. And since they’re invincible, the energy around the Churchman just kept escalating.
And war is numbers. Numbers are everything, brother. With multiple adventurers against one Churchman, the adventurers are stronger by default.
Actually, even if it came to blows, the adventurers would definitely win. He knows that too—that’s why he’s shrinking back! Too late, pal! Too late to shrink back now!
“W-What are you saying…? You lot aren’t even the rightful owners of the Dungeon!”
“And neither are you!”
“Who the hell do you think you are, struttin’ around like that!”
Even without fists flying, the verbal jabs are way faster! Clearly this church guy isn’t used to this sort of thing! So why the hell did he come here and start a fight-picking speech? He’s got zero foresight! That’s what you call pitch-black future!
And as the adventurers heated up further—
“Excuse me, may I?”
Edele-san’s cool, gentle voice rang out.
So much softer than the storm of abuse—but strangely, it carried clear as day.
…… Because it’s Edele-san. Because she’s someone the people here trust. That’s why everyone respects her words. The adventurers all went, “Oh, if Edele-san’s talking, let’s hear her out,” and fell silent, as if setting the stage for her.
And as the adventurers fell quiet, the Churchman even looked a little relieved—
“You spoke of donations, but that Dungeon… it’s the hope we finally grasped to rebuild our village. We cannot hand its rights over to the church.”
Edele-san said it quietly, yet with absolute conviction, and the Churchman flinched.
Wait, don’t tell me he actually didn’t expect to be refused!? He did!? Seriously!?
“B-But Panis Village, if I recall, gave little in the way of donations last year… A contribution to make up for that shortfall is required.”
“Does God wish for us to starve and suffer hardship for the sake of donations?”
…… At her straightforward gaze, the Churchman faltered again. I mean, come on, at least say, “Yes, He does!” or something.
“Without blessings, your livelihood will worsen, will it not?”
“Oh, you need not worry about that. This Dungeon is a blessing from the God we love. Isn’t that right?”
Edele-san’s “God” carried a shade of meaning… Wait, is that supposed to be me? Hey, is that me…? Kinda embarrassing!
“But surely the village doesn’t formally own the Dungeon rights? The land belongs to the lord, the lord is the king’s hand, and the king’s authority is given by God. This earth, this world, all belongs to God—”
“…… It belongs to God, yes, but not to you, does it?”
Edele-san showed no mercy now. None at all!
“God gave this Dungeon to us. Shouldn’t you be respecting that divine will?”
Her relentless blows left the Churchman with nothing to say!
“It isn’t God’s will just because it’s convenient or inconvenient for you, now is it?”
Nothing back! Absolutely nothing! At least struggle a little, man! Come on!
…… And so.
“Now then. Please take your leave. I’ll cover the bill. There’s an inn across the way you can stay at. For people spreading the teachings, at the very least let me ‘donate’ the cost of your meal and your lodging.”
Once the overkill was complete, Edele-san cut the talk off there.
Then—
“… You ought to refrain from such blasphemous words. Surely misfortune will befall your village.”
The Churchman glared bitterly. Hey, isn’t that basically a threat?
“And… if someone like you is so greedy as to refuse to part with a Dungeon… then surely that Dungeon must be an evil one…”
And now he’s just slinging petty insults. Got nothing better?
“In that case, it ought to be suppressed. I will inform the Holy Knights accordingly.”
…… And now he’s gone and said it! Suppressed!? What the hell does that mean!?
The adventurers, who had been watching quietly, broke out in murmurs at that. “Suppressed!?” “Is he out of his damn mind!?”
“Suppress it, you say? A Dungeon with no monsters?”
“Y-Yes! That is what should be done!”
Bolstered by the stir he caused, the Churchman declared it proudly.
“A village untouched by God’s will must suffer divine punishment! And in God’s stead, we shall deliver that judgment!”
…… And with that, the Churchman left, muttering about, “I must write a letter at once!” He scurried off into the inn like he was fleeing.
Well, things just got serious, huh.
So, I snapped my senses back into my body. Welcome back, me.
“Mishisia-san! Lisas-san! Let’s get to the dining hall right away!”
“What!? Did something happen to Edele-san!?”
“Yeah! Edele-san was crazy awesome!”
“W-What’s going on?”
And off we went. I had a lot to ask Edele, and we’d need countermeasures sooner rather than later.
On the way, I asked:
“Hey, Mishisia-san, Lisas-san. What does ‘Dungeon suppression’ mean?”
“Suppression!? He said that!?”
“Yeah. He did.”
“That’s…”
Lisas and Mishisia looked at each other, troubled. What’s this now?
“You see, Asuma-sama… it’s said that in the deepest part of a Dungeon, there’s a guardian. If you kill it, the Dungeon loses its function. No more mana, no more treasures, no more monsters.”
“There have also been reports of Dungeons with no guardian at all… in which case, when someone reaches the deepest part, they use a spell that snuffs the Dungeon’s life out.”
“Huh.”
I see. Yeah, if my Dungeon was spitting out more than slimes, the people of Panis couldn’t live here in peace. Folks would get hurt. In that case, shutting it down with ‘suppression’ would be the only option. Hm.
…… Wait.
“… So basically, my life’s in danger?”
“… That would be the case, yes.”
I see. That’s bad.
So we reached the dining hall, where Edele, the adventurers, and the villagers were in an uproar.
“That bastard, talking about ‘divine punishment’!? Saying it’s fine to destroy a Dungeon for that! Is he serious!?”
“Oh? Then it’d be fine for us to destroy him first, right!? Let’s storm the inn!”
“Let’s do it! I’m in!”
“No.”
Edele cut them off. Figures.
“… If a priest doesn’t return, the Church will investigate.”
“Then let’s say he died in the Dungeon!”
“Let’s do it! I’m in!”
“No, you won’t! That’ll only make them claim the Dungeon’s even more dangerous!”
Edele sure had her hands full stopping the hotheads… but honestly, seeing everyone go “aww…” and shrink back whenever she said “No!” was kinda funny. That’s the power of a village chief.
“Edele-san!”
I called out, and everyone turned with startled faces. Edele ran over, and—hugged me tight.
“I’m sorry, Asuma-sama. I couldn’t handle it well enough…”
“No, you were amazing, Edele-san!”
She seemed down, but to me, it was totally a “Yes, good job!” situation.
“At the very least, he showed his whole hand, didn’t he?”
…… That means we can prepare. That’s huge. We know their aim now. They’re after the crystals—and the wealth this Dungeon generates. Just knowing that makes things way easier.
And…
“… The ones coming to bring ‘divine punishment’ are the ‘Holy Knights,’ right, Edele-san?”
The intel game isn’t over yet. It’s just heating up.
“First, we need information on these Holy Knights. Once we know their size, track record, and ideology, we can plan.”
That’s the policy.
The enemy has their eye on us from the start. That much is clear. And this right here is the turning point… Even I can tell that much, Edele.
“… Asuma-sama.”
Edele looked overwhelmed with emotion, and hugged me again, tighter. So soft!
“You’re truly wise and strong… Forgive me. We should be the ones making it so you don’t have to be this strong…”
“Uh, Edele-san. I’m already 19, you know…”
I don’t need that much protecting, Edele. If anything, I think I’m the one protecting you.
…… But still, being cared for feels good. Thanks, Edele. Keep looking out for me, yeah!
“Then leave the info to us!”
And so—while I was being smothered, the adventurers spoke up.
“We’ve been to Dungeons all over! We know about some that got suppressed!”
“And we’ve got some intel on the Holy Knights too. We’ll be useful.”
That kicked off a chorus of “Me too!” “Count me in!” “I as well!” from all over.
“Huh… really? You’ll help us?”
I hadn’t expected this from the adventurers rather than the villagers, so I was a bit taken aback.
“Of course! If this Dungeon gets suppressed, our livelihoods go unstable again!”
“For ex-soldiers who lost limbs or eyes in war, a monster-free Dungeon like this is the perfect place to earn!”
…… Ah, I see.
Looking closely, I noticed some had eyepatches, or clumsy movements with their arms or legs.
I’d thought this Dungeon was just squishy slimes and not very profitable, but for folks like them, it’s the perfect match!
“So then, Edele—village chief lady! We’ll be staying here a while!”
“We know cases where the Holy Knights burned villages! If something happens, we’ll help protect yours!”
“This village’s been good to us. Let us pitch in!”
“Everyone… thank you! I don’t know how to thank you enough…!”
And so, the adventurers who matched perfectly with this Dungeon and Panis Village had already formed an attachment here. That means… we’ve gained some seriously reliable allies!
Just like they said—if the Holy Knights really do torch villages, we’d be shorthanded. But with these guys around… this defense looks winnable!
“I’ve been itchin’ to beat those smug church bastards fair and square…”
“Things are getting fun now! We’ll protect this village with everything we got! Hahaha!”
“I’m in! I’m in!”
…… Though, okay, maybe I’ve got a few worries. Just a few. They’re good people, I think. Yeah.
What is this… I don’t even… but whatever! Doesn’t matter!
All right then! Everyone, I’m counting on you!
What do you think about this chapter?
